When you get involved in a relationship in the beginning you try to be available , understanding and patient. In hindsight that is good. But how long is that going to work without losing yourself.
Now your feeling that what you have to say is no longer important. They act as if what is going on in their day is more important. And what is going on in yours, not so much.This happens so often in relationships, that it almost becomes second nature. Now is that Right or Wrong I dare not say. Because anyone can fall victim of this behavior . I need you to understand that I'm not passing judgment. I'm simply saying that it doesn't have to be that way. And trust me I know this is easier said than done.
So how do you break the cycle? How do we change or response to our mates. First we need to let ourselves know that we Love Our self and the people in our life are a part of our life, they are not Our Life. We must encourage our love ones to still be individuals. So that we may be individuals as well. We also need to stop being so passive, when they say or do things we really don't like.
Am I saying we should always respond in a defensive way? No. That will bring you a whole new can of problems. But do find a non confrontational way to get your point across. Often our mates don't realize they are taking us for granted . On the other hand they know it, but they just don't give a shit.
Our children are different. They will always need you. But we must encourage them to be independent. Not grow up too fast. but do some things on their own.......
Back to our mates. Do you find time for yourself as much as you find time for them? If the answer is no. Than this Monday or Tuesday is going to be your day. No If And's or Buts. Text them or make a note or call them on the phone and let them know. That your important day is coming up and you are not going to be able to cook, do laundry, child care or run errands. They are going to have to do them their selves. At first they are going to think you are kidding or you can't be serious. But simply assure them that you are. Then go on about your day. At first it will feel crazy. But everything will be fine. If you don't take your Time Out. They will not give it to you.... It's not that you don't still Love them. So don't think like that. You simply need some Me time. So you can be your best when you are giving them their time. Trust me they will get it. good Luck and smile your not alone.
As Always Have Sex Responsibly
Love Stormy Weather69
So how do you break the cycle? How do we change or response to our mates. First we need to let ourselves know that we Love Our self and the people in our life are a part of our life, they are not Our Life. We must encourage our love ones to still be individuals. So that we may be individuals as well. We also need to stop being so passive, when they say or do things we really don't like.
Am I saying we should always respond in a defensive way? No. That will bring you a whole new can of problems. But do find a non confrontational way to get your point across. Often our mates don't realize they are taking us for granted . On the other hand they know it, but they just don't give a shit.
Our children are different. They will always need you. But we must encourage them to be independent. Not grow up too fast. but do some things on their own.......
Back to our mates. Do you find time for yourself as much as you find time for them? If the answer is no. Than this Monday or Tuesday is going to be your day. No If And's or Buts. Text them or make a note or call them on the phone and let them know. That your important day is coming up and you are not going to be able to cook, do laundry, child care or run errands. They are going to have to do them their selves. At first they are going to think you are kidding or you can't be serious. But simply assure them that you are. Then go on about your day. At first it will feel crazy. But everything will be fine. If you don't take your Time Out. They will not give it to you.... It's not that you don't still Love them. So don't think like that. You simply need some Me time. So you can be your best when you are giving them their time. Trust me they will get it. good Luck and smile your not alone.
As Always Have Sex Responsibly
Love Stormy Weather69
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